Session 42 — July 2018

Frederic describes a repeating pattern: he tolerates a work environment for a while, then can no longer stand it and leaves, and he wonders whether reconciling with his inner child would make him stay longer.

The Wonders answer that this is not primarily an inner child matter but an adult one: as a young adult he decided to rebel against society, something he has done in many lifetimes, and part of his mind loves rebelling against society's impositions.

Inner child work would bring peace, tranquility and patience, but would not remove the rebellion, so wherever he works he will eventually say he has had enough.

They explain his leaving is driven by a well-developed instinct — a subconscious part that senses when it is time to go and when an opportunity is approaching that requires him to be free — and this instinct is beneficial and should be followed.

What they encourage him to change is the judging: to stop judging others for being fools, let fools be fools, have compassion and forgive them, and above all forgive himself for having placed himself among them, rather than using judgment of others and of himself as the justification or motivator to move.

They distinguish people who enjoy playing the fool from people who simply make mistakes, noting that judging the latter as stupid is really him judging his own past mistakes.

They identify part of this as inherited from his father, who did not tolerate fools easily, and warn him not to turn into his father as he ages.

Asked whether he would have stayed without this pattern, they say the more he judges the more he pushes against, and that it is not about forcing himself to stay but about sensing when the time is right to move; his habit of leaving one job before having another is his own way of staying available, and judging himself for that is inherited human and parental psychology.

The key word they leave him with is self-forgiveness, which will eventually reveal there is nothing to forgive and allow him to enjoy any environment.

Frederic reports he has begun the inner child work, finding Bradshaw's method complicated with what feels like ten thousand steps, but coming down to acknowledging feelings and being inclusive of them, and describing the experience as enlightening.

The Wonders say Bradshaw creates a puzzle that is not necessary to follow; instead he should look for the core essence of everything Bradshaw says, which Frederic identifies as acceptance.

They add that inner child work is very much related to forgiveness, including forgiveness between him and his father, and describe him as a complicated individual with a number of interrelating psychologies and belief structures.

They explain that as a person grows, judgments and the psychologies of parents, teachers and religion define them until they forget who they really are and forget the small child still inside, and that it is mainly the child that requires love.

Their closing guidance is to follow the love and he will find what he is looking for.